According to etymonline.com, when one examines the root word “victim”, we find a person greatly injured or made to suffer. Likewise, when one draws their attention to the root word “victor”, we find a person who overcomes. In this past cycle, during the collective trauma of COVID, the majority of us have lost loved ones and/or made decisions to alter our lives in some way. A sense of being stuck has been prevalent among the masses.
One of the methods to becoming unstuck is to acknowledge and identify negative thoughts, limiting beliefs and fears. When we can accept our responsibility in our own situation, it can be empowering and uplifting. Robert Frost said, “the only way out is through” and this is emphatically correct. The opposite approach would leave us circling around repeating patterns. If we choose this path, we remain comfortable. However, we only grow when we are uncomfortable.
All of us will face challenges and obstacles in our lives. We determine if we become victim or victor. Life lessons are unavoidable. And we cannot learn them for others. When something unpleasant occurs, the first rule of thumb is to remain calm and not be emotionally reactive. If we become triggered based on past events this could be detrimental to our health. By allowing time to pass, we can devise solutions that would remedy any problem.
When we make the choice to wallow in our pain, rather than move through it, it becomes harmful. Our minds take over and we obsessively ruminate. This lack mentality will place one in victim mode. The longer we remain in this mindset, the harder it will be to climb upwards. Not only this, but this state of mind may bring illness, injury, and disease to one who is already suffering.
We have a choice. We make the decision to become an overcomer. When we overcome, we develop resiliency strength, a firm foundation of self, a sense of survivorship, and a knowing that one can persevere through anything.
Choose to be the Victor.
Christine Langley-Obaugh, M.Ed.
Founder of STREST